I’ve been meditating on and thinking about that simple line. It may be only one verse, but it’s really convicting for who I am currently as a person. I swear like a trucker. I have a temper. I sometimes lose that temper, too. And because of that anger, I have said hurtful things in the past to people I am supposed to love. My mother. My sister. My ex-girlfriend Rachel. And probably too many other times and people to remember.
Up until today, I used to think cusswords were only cusswords, and that sometimes it’s a relief to swear. In some ways I still think it is a stress reliever to let the words fly every now and then. But I either never knew about this Bible verse, or had forgotten about it until today. And it is about so much more than watching one’s tongue.
I stumbled across it while watching The Gospel of Luke, an epic retelling of that Gospel on Netflix. Each of the four Gospels have been made into movies you can watch on Netflix. They’re simply called what they are (Gospel of Matthew, Gospel of Mark, Gospel of Luke, Gospel of John). These movies are long though. Roughly at least three hours long. But I find if you split them up into parts or sections, or find good stopping points, they’re enjoyable and enlightening to watch. I sometimes find them more entertaining than reading the Bible and doing things the old fashioned way. They’re brought to life by great actors and storytelling!
But that Bible verse was convicting for me. As someone who struggles with a temper and patience at times, when I heard “The mouth speaks what the heart is full of,” I had to ask myself, “That’s not me is it? I’m not a bad person, am I?” I try to do good things for other people. But I am a sinner who needs to improve on how I relate to others, and what I say.
I don’t know about the rest of you, but I sometimes don’t realize the kind of weight words carry. After all, they’re “just words” right? Boy, was I wrong. But in the same way we can really hurt people with what we say, we can lift them up and show them love and compassion as well with a kind or loving word or two. Pardon my French here, and go ahead and laugh if you want to, but I’ve gotta be straight: The saying “Sticks and stones will break my bones, but words will never hurt me,” is a load of bullshit. I have hurt people with certain things I have said. And I have been hurt by people with certain things they have said. But to hear Jesus Himself say that the words we say are basically a reflection of who we are as people, and they are a window into our character, it was an uncomfortable and convicting thought. I didn’t like what I saw in myself.
But that is usually the first small step in growing to become better versions of ourselves. We don’t like some aspect of who we are, and we try to become better. So while I may not be able to instantly stop swearing like a sailor from this point forward, I will at least try sincerely to be more mindful of how I come across, and what I say. It truly is interesting how we can glean a lot out of one small verse of Scripture, and see where we need to get better.
There was great disappointment in the way the 2019 Cleveland Browns performed this past season. I still don’t understand how such a talented team only mustered a 6-10 record, when they very easily could have (and probably should have) been at least 10-6 and making their first playoff appearance since January 2003.
Former head coach Freddie Kitchens was fired after the team’s loss at Cincinnati to end the season on December 29th. Rumor has it that he was fired right after getting off the team bus once he arrived back in Cleveland. He didn’t even make it to Monday.
But the Browns spared no expense in finding his replacement. After an exhaustive two and a half week coaching search that included the likes of former Packers head coach Mike McCarthy, Patriots offensive coordinator Josh McDaniels, 49ers defensive coordinator Robert Saleh, and former Baylor head coach Matt Rhule, the Browns chose former Vikings offensive coordinator Kevin Stefanski to be their newest head coach.
Admittedly, I did not know much about Stefanski before the team hired him, other than he was intrigued on working with current Browns quarterback Baker Mayfield. But now after having done some research, I’ve learned a little bit more about his background. Let’s take a look at the new man at the helm in Cleveland.
New Browns head coach, Kevin Stefanski
Coach Stefanski is a young head coach at 37 years old. At the start of his NFL coaching career back in 2006, he first served as the assistant to then-Vikings head coach Brad Childress. Stefanski then steadily climbed the ranks as a coach on the offensive side of the ball. His positions before assuming the head coach position with the Browns included: assistant quarterbacks coach (2009-2013), tight ends coach (2014-2015), running backs coach (2016), quarterbacks coach (2017-2018), interim offensive coordinator (2018), offensive coordinator (2019). As you can see, his background includes a wide variety of expertise working with all the different offensive player groups.
My initial opinion on the hiring of Stefanski was mixed to negative. But that was likely due to seeing many of these past head coaches fail to pan out. The Browns have not had a legitimate, proven head coach in Cleveland since Bill Belichick was in Cleveland from 1991-1995. They have mainly hired offensive and defensive coordinators in the hope that one of them would become a legitimate head coach. My initial issue with the hiring of Kevin Stefanski was not with who the man is, or his knowledge of the game. He seems extremely intelligent. But he has a long way to go until he turns the Cleveland Browns into a consistent winner. The turnaround will start with a coach who can keep all the loud personalities on his team in line.
While a flashy offensive system is interesting and fun to watch, it is most important for a winning Browns coach to be a disciplinarian. Sure, the team still is incredibly talented. But when there is no discipline, you have what happened in 2019: Personalities not playing as a cohesive unit, and overshadowing the common team goal, which is to win consistently. There is a quote from Stefanski that has already raised my opinion of him. In his introductory press conference, when asked about how he’d manage the personalities on the team, he simply said: “Personality is welcome. Your production is required.” If Coach Stefanski can stick to that mindset, and instill discipline when Baker Mayfield, Odell Beckham Jr., Jarvis Landry and others step out of line, it’ll pay dividends on the way to getting the Browns to where they should be as a winning football team.
State of the coaching staff
Along with having the right attitude, a successful head coach needs the right staff of men to support him as coordinators and position coaches. No head coach can win by themselves. Nor should they try. As of January 28th, the Browns coaching staff around Stefanski is not yet complete. But according to WKYC Channel 3 in Cleveland, Coach Stefanski has kept three coaches from Freddie Kitchens’ previous staff: Special Teams Coordinator Mike Priefer, assistant special teams coach Doug Colman, and running backs coach Stump Mitchell. While I do not know much about Doug Colman, the retention of Mike Priefer and Stump Mitchell make sense to me. Priefer previously worked as the Special Teams Coordinator for the Minnesota Vikings, while Stefanski was with them. So there’s a prior relationship between Stefanski and Priefer.
Last season in Cleveland, Stump Mitchell helped develop one of the most potent running backs in the league last year in Nick Chubb, who ran for 1,494 yards in 2019. Stump also worked with Kareem Hunt after his return from a suspension, and was able to turn him into an important part of one of the best 1-2 punches in the NFL, and make the Browns a legitimate threat when running the football.
Stump Mitchell
While attending the Greater Cleveland Sports Awards on January 22nd, Coach Stefanski was very clear about why he kept Stump Mitchell on his coaching staff: “I really like the way he teaches. I love the toughness that he brings to our staff room, to our field, and I think the proof is in the pudding. He had two really good players playing this year. So I think he’s an excellent coach, and excited that he’s going to be part of our future.”
As for the other key positions on the staff, Coach Stefanski has hired the following assistant coaches: Bill Callahan (offensive line coach), Drew Petzing (tight ends coach), and Chad O’Shea (wide receivers coach). I am most intrigued and excited about the hiring of Bill Callahan for a number of reasons. The offensive line was shaky and weak at times last season in protecting Baker Mayfield, which often was a contributing factor in bad decisions on his part. Baker is at his best when he is given time to throw thanks to solid pass protection. The running game also flourishes when there is effective blocking, and when the offensive linemen win the battle in the trenches and control the line of scrimmage.
According to Damien Woody, a former NFL offensive lineman who is currently a commentator for ESPN, Bill Callahan is a master technician at developing and mentoring offensive linemen. “You don’t necessarily have to be the strongest. It’s about your hands, your feet, and your leverage. Bill Callahan is just a master technician in drilling these things down day after day. And he is relentless in that. He will not stop. He will continue to do that every day, and that’s what makes him special.”
Bill Callahan
In addition to his wealth of experience in working with offensive linemen throughout the NFL and college ranks over the past three decades, Callahan has also held head coaching positions on three separate instances. He was with the Oakland Raiders from 2002-2003 (appeared in Super Bowl XXXVII), with Nebraska from 2004-2007, and served as the interim head coach of the Washington Redskins in 2019 following the dismissal of Jay Gruden.
New General Manager: Andrew Berry
In addition to assembling the coaching staff, Stefanski has been working with Browns owners Jimmy and Dee Haslam, to find their general manager. On January 27th, they made it official: They found their man in Andrew Berry. Berry will serve as both Executive Vice President of Football Operations and General Manager. Berry previously worked with the Browns from 2016-2018 as Vice President of Player Personnel under previous Browns General Managers Sashi Brown and John Dorsey. According to the Browns team site, in each season Berry was with the team, the Browns selected a future Pro Bowler (Joe Schobert, linebacker, 2016; Myles Garrett, defensive end, 2017; Denzel Ward, cornerback, 2018; Nick Chubb, running back, 2018).
New Browns GM, Andrew Berry
Berry is now the NFL’s youngest General Manager at 32 years old, but he has seen firsthand what it takes to stockpile and acquire talent to improve a team. And even though he is still very young in executive circles, there is a reason Berry is this high within an organization at his age. He’s incredibly intelligent, and his colleagues that he has worked with around the NFL trust him to make big-time decisions.
The only issue I have is knowing if Coach Stefanski, and Berry will get along. I still do not know if hiring a GM after hiring a head coach is a good way to go about things because of the relationship dynamic, and because a GM is usually a head coach’s boss. Although perhaps the Haslams are interested in assembling a non-traditional front office structure. Coach Stefanski also did have a say in who the new General Manager was going to be before Berry was hired. This looks like a non-traditional power structure that will be more collaborative in nature, rather than top down. In a typical front office, which operates with a top down dynamic, there are three levels to the power structure:
The Owner: The ownership group spends the money to hire General Managers, the head coach and his coaching staff, and the players. Also determines what the overall vision and culture for the football team should be.
The General Manager: Answers to the Owner, assembles a team that the owner wants in order to be in line with the owner’s vision and culture. Scouts, signs and drafts players who they believe will be a good fit for the team.
The Head Coach and his staff: Hired by the General Manager. Answers to the General Manager, and coaches the players that the General Manager signs and drafts.
It remains to be seen if this kind of collaborative front office is going to turn out really great, or be a mistake. I personally am not a fan in messing with tradition when it comes to the power structure of a football team. Can an unorthodox power structure succeed? Absolutely. However, there is a reason most successful front offices are built in the top down way I described, and why most winning teams follow this structure: IT WORKS. If something has been proven successful many times, I see no need to reinvent the wheel. Browns ownership should focus on creating a winning culture and football team before they try to outsmart everyone else in the league.
Berry replaces former Browns GM John Dorsey, who was relieved of his duties on New Year’s Eve, despite acquiring talented players such as Baker Mayfield, Jarvis Landry, and Odell Beckham Jr. Following the 2019 season, Browns Owner Jimmy Haslam wanted Dorsey to take a reduced role in the organization while still retaining the title of GM. But Dorsey declined, and parted ways with the team.
Overall, I am keeping a wait and see attitude with everything. The Browns still have the talent to compete with, and beat most teams in the NFL on the way to a great season in 2020. But it all hinges on getting the right people to Cleveland who run the show. Hopefully the Haslams, Paul DePodesta, Coach Stefanski, and Andrew Berry find the right people and players to restore the Browns to what they once were: A proud, successful, bedrock franchise of the National Football League!
Living by oneself definitely takes some getting used to. So I’ve been trying to keep myself busy by job hunting and looking for those kind of connections, or enjoying hobbies such as this or videogaming. But this morning, something happened that made me feel peaceful, or see “unexpected quiet time” in a different way.
For some reason, my TV would not work until just a little bit ago. Technology is only great when it works, am I right? But instead of getting angry about things not working like I normally would, I calmed myself and was like, “Okay. I’m going to focus on other things today instead of being upset and wasting time on the TV.”
As soon as I shifted that mindset, I began to actually enjoy the complete silence and feel content, and later asked Jesus to bring me closer to Him in any way, take care of me and forgive me. And since then, I’ve felt peace today. And I don’t often have this kind of thought, because I don’t really think that deep about it. But I wish I could physically SEE Jesus, talk to Him, and spend time with Him. It was like missing a friend and wishing you could see them again. I felt sad.
Even though I’m sure it was a hard life 2,000 years ago in the Middle East, I wish I had been able to tag along with Jesus and the Apostles back in their day. Witnessing miracles and seeing Jesus for myself would’ve been indescribable. I would’ve wanted to sit next to Him and be close to Him wherever He went. Although I know I would’ve been like Peter, when he said, “Depart from me, Lord. For I am a sinful man.”
Peter felt unworthy of following Jesus. I do too. Always. I never consider myself a leader or as strong in my faith as I think I should be. It bothers me when I sin one moment, and try to read Scripture or pray the next. But then I remember Jesus’ ultimate sacrifice, and am renewed day after day. It wasn’t always like this. I used to despair over whenever I would screw up, and feel like I was doomed to be in trouble. But constantly beating ourselves up is denying the healing that Jesus can bring. And He can bring us this healing and peace anywhere, and at any time of day. All we need to do is focus our minds and hearts on Him and ask.
Before I moved into the apartment, I often found peace and Jesus outside in nature. I love being outside when it’s warm out. But now I am finding Him in volunteering to help people, studying Scripture from time to time (I need to do that more often), and today, in the quiet time created by no TV, even though it wasn’t what I was expecting.
Jesus is always there. We just have to calm our minds, pray to Him, and allow our mind and heart to go closer to Him. Finding Him and growing closer to Him doesn’t have to mean simply going to Church every Sunday either, although I encourage everyone to go if that’s how they find Him the easiest. But you can find Him and spend time with Him everywhere. He brings unbelievable peace to those who find Him. It’s like you don’t have to worry about anything, you’re content, secure, and stronger in your faith. And you’re more capable of being patient, kind and loving to others. More like Him.
Hey everybody! I’m back! Hope everyone’s having a good Martin Luther King Day! 🙂
But I thought I’d pick up where I left off, and introduce you to some of my good friends. They’re the circle of people I roll with, haha. It really is interesting how life gives and takes certain people from our paths. In my past I had some of these same friends, but I also had other people I used to be friends with and talk to all the time. I thought they’d be around for a while. But life, perhaps different views on values, and other things took them off my path.
I used to be really sad whenever I’d lose a friend I thought would be around for a long time. But now I realize that life is always changing. It’s never constant. Plus I also understand now that people are blessings, lessons, or both. And losing people also shows me the kind of ideal circle of friends I want to surround myself with. It helps me learn what I want and don’t want in a close friend. I am friendly to just about everyone. That’s me. If I don’t like someone, something’s wrong. But if I see someone as a lifelong friend who is worth my time and energy, I give them everything. So let’s meet “the gang” shall we?
Tony
I first met Tony back in early 2011, when I was a freshman completing my second semester at Kent State. I remember three things about meeting him: It was cold and snowy since it was January, I felt instantly comfortable talking to him, and I actually met someone who could keep up with me when it came to talking sports! We discussed the upcoming NFL Draft that day, since it seems like our beloved Cleveland Browns will ALWAYS be in rebuilding mode.
We’d always hang out at least once a week when I was on campus too for lunch and bond that way. I miss those days. Now I have to venture up to Kent every few months to go see him, but I always carve out “bro time.”
Folks, if you know both me and Tony, you already know how we are personality-wise, but if you don’t know us, let me just say: if you watch us interact within the same room, you’re in for a laugh riot! I don’t know why Netflix hasn’t come calling either one of us yet for our own comedy series or standup special. They’d make buku bucks off of that! Two guys with Cerebral Palsy who are brutally honest straight shooters, who love sports, and who have a wicked sense of humor when it comes to our conditions and SO many other things? They’re missing out! Every time I visit, it’s probably a max of five minutes until either one of us is dying laughing about something!
I’m glad he’s in my life because of how much he makes me laugh. But he’s also been there when I haven’t been laughing and smiling. He’s seen plenty of tears, too. He has been there for me through all of my low points and stressful times, and has pushed me and kept me going, and not let me feel sorry for myself. Which is all too easy to do sometimes. I consider him my closest friend, and talk to him every day. And I told him that if I ever get married, I would definitely consider him for my Best Man. Although I don’t know if I’d want him planning my bachelor party, haha! We’re going to still be friends when we’re a couple of old men in the nursing home. He’s my “big brother.”
Alex
Alex and his girlfriend, Madison
Alex has been my oldest friend. I can’t even remember how long we’ve known each other, but it’s at least been 20 years! His sisters Cassy and Bryanna used to babysit for my sister Christy and I when we were little, and Alex and I grew up riding the school bus too. I used to spend a lot of time with him at his parents’ house. There was always some kind of game or fun going on down in the basement. Even as grown men now, we still do that from time to time. Especially when he comes up from Alabama to Ohio with Madison to visit. When he’s there, we always have to hang out and drink a cold one at least once at Paul and Sue’s. Or when it’s warmer out, light a bonfire, have some friends of ours over and have a good time. His parents are wonderful people for letting me spend time with him and everyone at their house. Paul always cracks me up, and Sue is a sweetheart!
Alex, or “Al” as I sometimes call him, is one of those friends who I keep in touch with, but he’s such a close friend that if I don’t physically hang out with him in a few months, whenever we do hang out, it feels like we didn’t miss a beat!
We always talk Buckeye football too. He’s the biggest Buckeye fan I know, and that makes sense considering he and Madison both graduated from THE Ohio State University! Every Saturday morning during fall Saturdays, one of us always texts the other “O-H!!!” and gets a hearty “I-O!!!” in return! He’s a Steelers fan unfortunately, but that makes for some interesting comedy and conversation…even if most of the time I come out on the losing end.
It’s really neat how he’s still here, and always someone I can reach out to. In spite of all the twists and turns we’ve both taken on the path of life, he’s still there. I think that’s God telling me to keep him. And I definitely will!
Slade
Slade and I with his aunt and uncle at a Cleveland Indians game, 2013
While I try to be friendly to everyone, and definitely was that way in high school, Slade is probably my closest friend from that time in my life. I knew of him of when we were teenagers, but we really got to know each other when I was a Sophomore in high schol, and he was a Senior. He’s two years older than I am. But we first got to know each other in Mrs. Tanner’s class.
Slade and I are both hardworking, intelligent guys, but Mrs. Tanner was our special education teacher when we were in high school. It took me longer to finish complex homework, and she sometimes helped him to get concepts he was struggling with. We bonded over sports (what else? Haha) and drove Mrs. Tanner and our classmate Korey absolutely crazy with it! He’s a big Cleveland sports fan like I am.
But I also admire him for his extremely high work ethic. He works hard and busts his butt with everything he does in life. If the world had more Slades, things would get done in a HURRY!
He’s sometimes socially awkward, and shy, but once he knows people, he’s got an absolute heart of gold and will give anything to those he cares about. He’s always been there for me. And while we’ve both taken care of each other, one instance of him taking care of me sticks out in my mind as to how far he’ll go to take care of those who matter to him.
I was home for Christmas break one winter, and we were spending time with his friends Dylan, Lisa and Julian, who is from Germany. We were outside in the snow, and it was bitterly cold. The wind stung my face, and the snowflakes felt like tiny little darts. We went sledding if I remember correctly. I don’t know why I wasn’t wearing gloves at the time, but before I could put them on, I was pushed down a snowdrift and fell out of the sled, and used my bare hands to catch myself. Not smart. At all. Wet hands and bitterly cold wind? That’s a good way to get frostbite and lose a couple fingers!
I only have seizures from queasiness once or twice a year if that. I haven’t had a seizure in almost three years, knock on wood. But as soon as my hands got wet that night, I couldn’t move them and thought I had frozen them. I thought I’d eventually lose a few fingers or my hand! Then the seizure started kicking in, and I felt lightheaded and tried to alert everyone that I wasn’t doing well. No one seemed to understand right away what was going on, but Slade did. He took me back to Dylan’s truck, helped me in, and cranked up the heat. After I warmed up, he asked if I wanted to stay with everyone, or go with him to his parents’ house. I went with him back to Jeff and Theresa’s house.
As soon as we were inside I felt so much better. I relaxed and recovered, even though I couldn’t feel the tips of my fingers for at least another day afterward. We watched episodes of a hilarious adult cartoon show called Metalocalypse, and shared a good laugh, and then all was normal again.
I didn’t realize that night how much he helped me. But as the years have passed, I realized that’s what true blue friends do. I love Slade for his sense of humor, he inspires me to work hard because he works hard, and he’s always ready to talk about the Browns, Cavs or Indians. But I admire him most for his heart of gold. If you’re ever fortunate to meet someone like Slade, keep them. The world is full of fakes. But he’s as genuine as they come!
Dave
Dave, his girlfriend Ashley and I at the Ohio State Spring Game last April
Dave is another high school friend of mine. I graduated from Carey High school in 2010 with his older brother, Scott, but I first met him when I was a Junior and he was a Freshman. We got to know each other in Mr. Asher’s Human Conflict and War class, which would’ve been a really neat class if Mr. Asher would’ve actually bothered to teach it instead of taking a nap, haha!
But he’s always been good to me and kept in touch with me. Even though we’re both busy with life, he always tries to get me out of my apartment or parents’ house to have a good time whenever he can. Whether it’s at the Ohio State Spring Game, or simply spending time going out to eat at Texas Roadhouse or Buffalo Wild Wings, he always livens things up, or we crack each other up! Aside from my parents, Dave and his girlfriend Ashley were actually my first visitors to the apartment after I’d moved in. When you’re living alone, it really is special when people go out of their way to visit you, or make you feel welcome. And Dave has always done that!
Melissa
Last, but most definitely not least, is my friend Melissa. She’s a more recent friend, but she’s still important to me. I first met her in August 2018. My girlfriend at the time was a bridesmaid for a childhood friend of Melissa’s. She’s unique in my circle of friends in that she’s English! Yep, she came across the pond to help celebrate the wedding, and that’s where I first got to know her.
I wasn’t sure how to act around her or the other English people at the wedding at first, just because I’m a loud personality, which, no pun intended, isn’t everyone’s cup of tea. But as I got to know her at the wedding, and in the weeks and months after, I realized that she was fun to talk to, laid back and very understanding. Some people might have this stereotype of English people being prim, proper or rigid, but she’s not like that all! She always makes me laugh, and she’s very informal, which is definitely more my style.
I also enjoy texting back and forth with her because we both use our versions of slang, and can learn new sayings from each other. Up until a couple days ago, I never knew what the acronym OAP means, and she doesn’t often hear the word “shucks” used in everyday conversation, haha. I just think it’s neat learning different cultural things from each other, or teaching each other what life is like in our part of the world.
It’s really cool too how we can have polar opposite political views and religious beliefs, and still be respectful and good friends, and have deep discussions from time to time. I am a Christian who leans right on the political spectrum. She’s an atheist who leans more left. But our respect for each other trumps everything else.
I have never been out of the country before, but someday, I want to travel to England to visit her, her husband and daughter. Although I’ll have to be on my best behavior when she shows me around. I can’t be a loud, obnoxious American over there. The Brits have their rules, after all 😉
I would rather have a few people I could count on to keep in touch with me and be there for me, over hundreds of acquaintances I don’t get to know on a personal level. Blessed to have all of these people in my life!
I have always been a people person. Some have called me a “social butterfly.” I just love being around others. I am at my absolute best when I am in the company of those I care about. Which is why it is definitely taking some adjusting getting used to truly living on my own for the first time in my life. I cannot just go down the hall here at the apartment complex and chat with people like I used to do when I was in the dorms at Kent State.
I have no roommate or girlfriend. I am truly alone. It’s a scary and sobering experience. Until I remember my circle of friends.
You know, as I get older, I realize it’s so much more important to have a close, tight-knit circle of people there for you when times get tough, or you approach a new stage in life. Many acquaintances are a dime a dozen. But a handful of true friends and family are like fine gems. Hard to find and impossible to replace.
I don’t know if she was right. But for some reason, a quote by a character named Karen Page from one of my favorite TV series, The Punisher, hits home: “Sometimes I feel that all life is, is trying not to be lonely.” I think there’s definitely an element of truth to that.
But I have leaned on my family and friends through everything, and they have leaned on me too when they’ve needed help and support. They’ve gotten me through many rough and uncertain spots. From two college degrees, the death of my cousin and grandmother, the worst breakup I’ve ever had, and getting my own place. If they weren’t here, I’d be in a world of hurt. I’d be an absolute emotional wreck.
I’ll never understand people who completely close themselves off from this kind of support either. Humans are social creatures, meant to be in the company of other people. That’s how God created us. To love and to be loved. When we close ourselves off, we become bitter, miserable and angry. And who in the hell wants to live like that? I don’t!
I feel I should tell you a little bit about the people who are the biggest stabilizing influence in my life right now, starting with my family.
Me, Mom, Pop, and Christy
The two-parent, “normal” family is rare anymore. But I am glad my mother Stacy, and father, Larry have been married for almost 30 years. (Their 30th Anniversary is actually on July 12th!) Have they had a perfect marriage? Absolutely not. But they have raised my sister and I in a loving home. They’re old school in their values, such as hard work, having faith in God, and respecting others. But “old school” is refreshing in a world where it seems like everyone is so confused about many things!
I view Mom and Pop as two personalities that balance each other out. Especially when it came to raising me. Pop was “the heavy” and laid down the law when I screwed up. But he was, and still is also the first one to give me a hug and encourage me when I do right! He showed me how important it is to be a man with character. He’s taught me to be a man who says what he means, means what he says, and who tries to live by that. And to stand up for people and myself. He toughened me up.
Mom was definitely the nurturing one, as most mothers probably tend to be with their children. She was patient with me growing up when I was a small boy with Cerebral Palsy. I am sure it absolutely was not easy seeing me walk with braces or a walker. Or teaching me necessary life skills. That’s probably hard enough for a parent with a physically normal child. Let alone one with a condition of any kind. But she let me know I was loved all the same. I was not “different” or “ugly” or not worthy of love. I was just me 🙂
My sister, Christy and I definitely have different personalities. She is Type A, where she is very goal-oriented and driven, and that’s awesome! I myself am definitely Type B, in that I still work hard at something I want to accomplish, but I think I slow down and try to enjoy life more because I cannot go at her speed or pace. I tried doing that in the past and it drove me crazy, stressed me out, and simply wasn’t me. What makes us happy also seems different. If I had people over here in the apartment to visit, or I went home to visit Mom and Pop, that would make me happy in that I am a homebody. Someone who feels content to be close to family and loved ones always. Christy and I both love our family, but she’s more of the adventurous type who travels a lot and sees new things. I want to be more like her in that way. One of these days I want to travel either to Las Vegas or England to visit a friend and her family!
No matter how different we are personality-wise though, I am also learning something important as time passes: The sibling rivalry of the past (and we had a LOT of it), fades. And you start to realize that you can get along better, and be there for each other when needed. I now chuckle at, and agree with what Mom used to say. It was annoying at the time, especially after she broke up fights between Christy and I, but now it makes perfect sense: “You two are the only siblings you’re ever going to have! So quit fighting and get along! Because one day your Dad and I will not be here!”
I am truly fortunate to have my family. I always have to work not to take it for granted that I have such a good one. Because in today’s society, a tight, two-parent family who is always there for each other is a rarity. Or at least it’s becoming more and more rare unfortunately. Where children learn to be decent people, and how to treat others, begins in the home, with hopefully a good family. And when times get rough, if this person has a good family like I do, they are supported, loved, and helped through everything until they can get back on their feet. Aside from Jesus’ sacrifice and life itself, my family is God’s greatest blessing!
But I also have other blessings too. They’re called friends! Stay tuned, and you’ll meet my friends Tony, Slade, Alex, Dave, and Melissa 🙂
This has definitely been a change of pace for me over the last few days, but I have been interested in reading something called the Gnostic Gospels. That is, the lost and rejected gospels attributed to Peter, Thomas, Mary Magdalene, and even Judas Iscariot. Most people are interested in a standard Bible study of the Synoptic Gospels (Matthew, Mark, Luke and John).
But I was interested in reading these “lost gospels” for a few reasons. Mostly because I wanted to see how they differed from the regular Gospels. But also because I wanted to see if there was anything I could learn from them that wasn’t in the Bible, and because I was interested to see what the Church was hiding, if anything.
This interest came from when I watched a documentary called Pagan Christ. A former Catholic priest stated that Jesus never existed, and that all the miracles, stories and sayings attributed to Him were made up, and that He was a character that represented the struggle of Man to be the best version of ourselves. I strongly disagree with him. I think he is wrong and misguided. Jesus was not only a historical person proven to exist by non-Christian sources, I believe that He is the Messiah of humanity. He is who He says He is.
But I still believed the Gnostic gospels were worth checking out, if not just out of curiosity. I’m still digesting them, but of the ones I have read, I understand why they were rejected. Here’s what I found:
Gospel of Thomas: Rejected probably because any familiar sayings in it were borrowed after Matthew, Mark, Luke and John were written, and the “unheard sayings” didn’t sound like Jesus, or didn’t make logical sense. There was also a saying in the Gospel of Thomas that inferred that Jesus wasn’t God, but merely a man. You’ve heard the “Give to Caesar that which is Caesar’s” saying. But instead of the saying we know in the Bible, it was tweaked, and instead says: “Give to Caesar that which is Caesar’s. Give to God that which is God’s. And give to me that which is mine.”
Gospel of Judas Iscariot: This was the one I was most interested in reading, because there is reportedly a conversation between Jesus and Judas, in which Jesus explicitly tells Judas to betray Him. If that indeed happened, it would paint Judas in a TOTALLY different light. Instead of being synonymous with “traitor,” Judas would be the facilitator of our salvation by helping Jesus complete His plan, and might be in Heaven, instead of Hell, where we expect him to be.
I haven’t yet read Peter and Mary Magdalene, but I am definitely interested in them as well. I encourage you to all take a look at the links to Judas and Thomas at the bottom of the page. And read them with skepticism. Keep the faith you have, but also keep an open mind, and make your own conclusions as to what they are. I am not trying to corrupt anyone. I am merely trying to share something I find interesting.
I saw something that angered me earlier today for a number of reasons. A 9th grade girl from Kentucky was expelled from her school, Whitefield Academy. But it wasn’t for the reason you might think. When people get expelled from high school, it’s usually for drug possession, possession of weapons, continuous fighting or other bad behavior.
But Kayla Kenney, the girl in the picture above, was expelled from the school after administrators caught sight of a Facebook post by her mother in which she was wearing a rainbow shirt during her birthday celebration, complete with a rainbow birthday cake. Let’s turn a blind eye to bullies who have gotten worse thanks to a lack of parenting, and other serious issues high school students face like depression, and finding out who they are, as well as their purpose in the world, and kick a girl out of school for a shirt she wore. If the administrators really were THAT upset over things, they should’ve given her another shirt to change into, let her do so, and then remind her of their dress code if they have one. That’s what administrators would do at Carey High School, and it seemed fair to me.
But I digress. The real issue here, at least to me, boils down to one simple thing: Whitefield Academy, and so many other schools, are focused more on political correctness. Rather than protecting, nurturing, and encouraging children to be who they are, or at least try to help them find out who they are, and enjoy doing so. I don’t know how you all were as teenagers, but I hadn’t found my identity yet back in 2006. Hell, I’m almost 30 years old now, and I still am searching for my place in the world.
But instances like this favor a school’s policies over the healthy growth of children into unique individuals who each have their own gifts and personalities to offer to the world. It stifles individuality. You can see how this gets me going. I already don’t like institutions telling others how to live. But when a person’s individuality is threatened, that’s two strikes. This country already has enough mindless drones and sheep who can’t think for themselves. What it needs are individuals. People like Kayla Kenney who bring joy, and a breath of fresh air to a bland world. I hope Whitefield Academy pays dearly for this in whatever way possible. Schools should be places of learning and discovery. Not a place for bureaucrats to enforce rules.
Luke's Thoughts 